Artificial Stupidity

Yeah, there's a buzzword for ya. AI, or artificial intelligence. It's been a main staple in any game since ever, umm, ever. But nobody gave much of a care till games entered the third dimension. Ever since, it's been thrown around more then Paris Hilton.

Numerous games have tried to claim the AI crown. From Space Invaders and it's relatively simplistic enemy AI action, to Oblivion and its so-called "Living, breathing world", AI has seen a major leap forward. No longer will gamers tolerate allies running into walls, or kamikaze enemies that aren't normally violent.

Yes, gaming has taken a huge step forward in the AI department. But is AI, or gamers for that matter, ready to take the next step? The goal of AI is to emulate real life (or as close to real in the context of the game), right? Then why is AI so perfect all the time?

Let me explain. When it applies to games, programmers are always to make their games more realistic. Too bad life isn't always perfect. Take Halo 2 for exapmle: Sure, walking around the game, grunts would fall asleep, and act surprised when MC awoke them.

But it's not that realistic! If you were an elite, and you were bored with a tank, you wouldn't just sit there, waiting for MC to come around and you could blast him. Nope, you would probably take the tank, and have a little fun. I'm sure it would seem odd to come upon a new area, and not find the elites al lexpecting you, but that is more realistic!

Take oblivion for example. Sure, the NPC's seemed pretty real, not just standing around to offer you a quest. And for the most part, this is pretty real. But not quite enough.

See, NPC's need to have lives that extend far beyond the moment you kill them. Pretend a NPC is going through a big break up with his "wife". He might have a nervous breakdown, and decide to kill everything that moves. Place that near the character, and you'll have a villager come out of nowhere and attack you with a knife.

Or GTA. In San Andreas, I believe there were a couple of NPC's that would in a sense jump from a high place and commit suicide, kind've like lemmings. Here, I was at the local grocery store, and I decided to take a nice evening stroll through the parking lot. Now, put that into a sandbox game like GTA. It's probably look weird and feel odd to watch a NPC walk around the parking lot for no reason.

Yeah, that's the problem. AI like that doesn't fit into a videogame. Gamers are used to their enemies lying in wait around the next objective for them. Heck, I'd feel weird watching a NPC stroll around the parking lot in GTA. And not being told why a character does something unexpected like that can be frustrating for a gamer.

I dunno, maybe there will be a shift, and AI like this will become more of the norm. But I would like to be told why NPC #365 just attacked me with a knife. Who knows?

Real Men Play Videogames

See, this is one thing the bothers me. Apparently, the collective intelligence doesn't believe video games to be very manly. Ask my dad, video games aren't manly, mowing the lawn is manly. Ask the rednecks, NASCAR is manly. But apparently, video games are not.

But why? Is it the adrenalin rush? If NASCAR can provide a rush, then can't a racing video game? Or if Not NASCAR 06, how about a horror game? It mustn't be the rush, because video games can provide the same rush.

Is it the getting down and dirty part? Like fixing a car? Personally, I don't care about cars. I don't care wither the axel attaches to the drive shaft or the transmission. I would rather spend a day playing Halo 2 online with some buddies, then on the ground, covered in engine oil, hoping I remember how to put this damn contraption back together.

Or maybe it's the game play itself. I suppose that some men out there only have the attention span to watch a wrestling match or a 500 lap race. But, throw a couple of video gamers their way, all ones that control and play different, and they just freak out.

Maybe it's the game play in general. I mean, compared to the old atari joystick, today's controls are pretty scary looking. I guess most men out there don't have the coordination out there to handle 2 analog sticks, as well as 10 or so other buttons.

Or it may be the lack or realism. I suppose getting out on the football field and getting sacked in the chest is more "fun" or "manly" then acting it out with your XBox 360. I guess sadism and being emo is more manly then having all your body parts intact.

I dunno, I guess I'll never understand why videogames aren't considered manly. Personally, I'll keep playing them until the day I die.

Oh, Call of Duty 3 is slated to come out November 17th.

Get me the hell outta here!

Name: Exit
Platform: PSP
Price: $39.99
Developer: Taito Corp.

Exit, interesting name, even more interesting premise. You play as Mr. Esc, an escapologist. You get paid to help otherwise helpless civilians of all ages escape from different perilous situations.

The level design is spot on. The puzzle elements are right as they should be, easy to learn, but hard to master. And with over 100 levels, master you shall.

Game play is fun, without getting to tedious. As with a good puzzle game, you will need to do most of the levels several times before it "clicks" and the pieces fall into place. But you won't be stomping on the floor and pulling your hair out.

Mr. Eschew will have to move boxes, make bridges, use ropes and ladders to reach his destination. The levels can feature anything from a simple ladder puzzle all the way up to a multi-layer building with several one way doors and small crawl spaces.

In fact, Mr. Esc will need to recruit the ones he saves. There are three types of help, the kids, the young adults, and the old adults. The kids are the most limber but require help over taller objects. The old adults can't jump over large caverns, but they can help move heavy objects. And the young adults are the best of both worlds.

The controls work just the way you would expect them to. You use the D-Pad to control Mr. Esc, and the analog nub is used as a sort of mouse to order your dimwitted help around. And there-in lies my one complaint of this game. Most of the times, the A.I. works fine. But sometimes you just want to yell at them. If I want to order an adult upstairs, I don't want them to take the long way, that is blocked in the end by some crates! Duh!

But the game is mostly pie and chips. And even as icing on the cake, there are 110 downloadable bonus levels available, giving you a total of 210 fun, challenging levels of puzzle/actiony goodness.

I give it 4 drowning Mr. Esc's out of 5.

(Word on the street is that Halo 3 comes out in 2007) :)

Graphicsgasim

Modern computing is great. We can crunch numbers in a jiffy. We can play the best modern day games. We can chat with others that are several states away. But all is not well in computer paradise...

As I have said, computers are great. We are constantly moving towards more realistic graphics. With your Half Life 2's and your Oblivion's, PC gaming is constantly getting better. Every game, a step forward.

Modern computing has opened up PC gaming to a group of people that wouldn't be gaming other wise: the motion-sick. Myself included. Modern computing has enabled those who would otherwise be unable to have a good time, play.

But, therein lies the problem. If I want to play, oh say, Elder Scrolls 4, I need a top of the line computer. Nvidia 7300, 2GB of Ram, relatively current processor.

Here, come away with me. I borrowed Oblivion from my friend. I pop it in, and am utterly perplexed, and a little sick. My computer cannot handle oblivion. I even downloaded a patch to allow the game to run on lower settings, and I still couldn't play for over an hour.

See, modern computing is both a blessing and a curse. One one end, there are new games coming out, aimed at pressing the limits of technology, leaving the cheap and tech-no-how's in the dust. On the other hand, there is an ever increasing amount of technology to back up this constant evolution of gaming.

PC gaming needs to slow down, take a break, and stop trying to one-up itself. Sometimes, the greatest games out there (Counter Strike and World Of Warcraft for example) don't need an uber nice top of the line $3k plus computer. There will always be innovation, and the technology will eventually be there to support it. But motion sick and otherwise PC gamers shouldn't have to wait for the technology to support the next best game to become affordable!